It's officially been five years since I lost my Dad. I still remember that day in the hospital; the sterile smell, the beeping sound of every single machine, and my Dad laying there completely still. That entire week, I watched him get weaker and weaker with each passing day. I witnessed every vital organ fail, leading up to that Sunday evening, when his heart couldn't take it anymore. The nurses turned off the sound on the machines, as they were screeching what seemed to be erratically. I was still in shock when the nurse called time of death; I still am in shock to this day. He was my Dad, but also my friend; the friend I could kick back with a beer and sit in silence with, or chat about everything going on in the world. He loved me unconditionally. He was so proud to introduce me as his daughter; his face lit up.
When I turned to leave his hospital room, I felt and instant void. That feeling that someone loves you more than life itself was missing; the unconditional love was gone.
I hope anyone reading this never feels the pain of losing unconditional love. I truly believe it is one of the worst pains the human body can go through. It broke me, and I'm still trying to repair that fracture everyday. I miss my Dad so much. I miss our phone calls. I miss him worrying about me. I miss the love.
Five years of loss, of mourning. I always say it doesn't get easier, but our ability to withstand pain gets stronger. Miss you Dad. I hope I'm making you proud. #sunday#memories#Dad#loss#life#five#years#love#pain#missyou#misshim#thebest#father#friend#lovehim